Via my newest obsession...pintrest!

Howdy! I know I haven't blogged in awhile, but I promise to catch you up on the sweet Jubana-goodyness and updates soon! In the mean time, here are some things that caught my eye on my newest obsession...Pintrest! (if you need an invite, message me :) )



Goodies to satisfy any Despicable Me addicts...




I feel like this fits our place perfectly! Maybe in the Laundry Room perhaps?





A Work in Progress!!



Hairy Potter



I really want to incorporate this into the wedding!

Pretty factual actually :)



I would be a proud card carrying member if we had cards




So Cute!!

 


No Caption Needed...

 



A year of love, laughter, and promise of what is to come...Happy Anniversary

A year ago today we "officially" started dating and I fell in love with the most amazing man on the planet. And to think it all started with a chance meeting online, countless phone calls and texts, followed by a dozen pink roses, a date (which got off to an albeit rocky start), and walk down by the "river" that would change our lives forever. My darling you I dedicate this blog and the song below to you as like you said it's as if it was written for us. Happy one year anniversary baby. I love you.

If I gave you pretty flowers
If I took you out to dinner
If we walked on by the river
Would you invite me in

If we sat down on the sofa
If I told you funny stories
If I moved a little closer
Would you put your hand in mine

If I told you, you were lovely
If I put my arm around you
If I touched you on the shoulder
Would you rest your head on mine

If I took you out to dinner
If I moved a little closer
And I touched you on the shoulder would you make love to me

Oh my darling I have loved you since you took me out to dinner
Since we walked down by the river over 30 years ago
When you told me that you loved me I hadn’t felt so lovely
Since the day I decided that I would marry you

Well I took you out to dinner
And I told you funny stories
And I moved a little closer
And you made love to me

If I gave you pretty flowers
If I took you out to dinner
If we walked down by the river la la la la la la la

Operation Bridal Party is Complete!

Although the big day isn't for over a year it was essential for me to ask my bridal party ASAP, especially because two out of my 5 lovelies live out of state. So here's our timeline...

March 27, 2011: The Day Brad proposed

And because so many of you have asked how it happened...here's our story...

We had been searching for months for the perfect ring and had found some great contenders but none of them were the heavy weight champ of my diamond ring world. Meanwhile Brad had been making plans based on locations (Dallas, Cstat, Austin, and San Antonio) on how and when to ask. Finally, right before I left San Antonio to come back to Cstat we decided to go check out a new outdoor shopping area called the Quarry and right in front of us sat my ring. We walked into the store, tried it on, and instantly fell in love. It was exactly what I was looking for and more. A couple of weeks later when we were back in San Antonio he decided that it was time to buy the ring. The only issue was that the ring wasn't available in SA but was available in Austin but in the wrong size. Despite this, he bought the ring and intended for me to get it resized and then pop the question at another time. So we decided to drive separately to Austin so we could see his parents and try on the ring which ended up working out perfectly because he called my Dad and Abuelo to ask for permission. Once in Austin and at his parents house we went upstairs to his room. He took out the ring and asked me to try it on. Miraculously, it fit perfectly. The next thing I knew he was on his knee asking me if I would spend the rest of my life with him. He said that he knew that I wanted something romantical, but the more and more he planned it, the cornier his ideas got. In the end, he decided that he didn't want to wait anymore to be engaged to me. Cue the waterworks!! And the rest will become our colorful and incredible history and future...

That night after I made my upteen million calls I asked his sister to be one of my bridesmaids and she happily said yes!! Hence the creation of operation bridal party...

The next person that I set out to ask was my MOH (Maid of Honor). To me this was an easy decision. When I think of Maid of Honor I automatically thought of someone who has been an unwaivering person in my life and without their help and encouragement I would have never moved back to Texas. Mindy is one of my best friends and the sister I never had but always wanted. Although we only started hanging out once I moved back I've known this girl for a long time through my brother.

I decided to buy her a cookie with a poem on it and have it shipped to her apartment. The only hiccup was that USPS delivered it to the wrong apartment complex!! For days I was calling the company trying to track down her package and finally it was delivered. On Monday, April 25th, She laughed, cried, and said yes leaving two down and three to go.

The next covert operation was highly secretive and required lots of planning and redirection. Luckily, the flight was already secured and surprises were wrapped in their little boxes, all I had to do was fight my urge to blab and wait for Memorial Day Weekend. Finally the weekend came and the girls picked me up from the airport in KC and we headed to lunch, which fell perfectly in with my plan. Unbeknownst to the girls, I bought two fortune cookies that doubled over as jewelry boxes. Each cookie had a special note inside asking them to be my bridesmaids. Once we were at lunch, ironically of all places, a Japanese restaurant (I know they don't serve fortune cookies there, but hey it was close enough), I gave them their boxes and waited for them to open them. On Saturday, May 28th, With big smiles they accepted, we hugged and chowed down on some delicious sushi, leaving me with one more target to go...

My last and final bridesmaid is my cousin Mica. I've kinda already asked her over the phone but haven't had the chance to ask her in person. I will however see her this weekend so for all intents and purposes, Operation Bridal Party has been completed!!

Now the fun begins!! I love these girls so much and cannot wait to celebrate this important time in my life with them.

Visitando La Frontera...Greetings from Aggies Reaching Out (ARO) South Texas

Salutations from McAllen! This past Sunday we made the trek from College Station (or as my Alle calls it, ECollege Estation) to the valley to work with three middle schools in the McAllen area. The ride down here was nonstop laughing, singing, and joking thanks to our awesome counselors, random walkie talkie talk,  and some albeit, inspiring scenery. After getting a slightly late start we arrived around 7pm and went straight to dinner because these college students needed a well deserved break and food in their tummies. Needless to say after I arrived to our hotel I unpacked and passed out.

My days have started around 6:30am and usually end around 9:30pm but every minute has been worth it. Our middle schools have been our second homes for the past three days and I feel so blessed to have the opportunity to be a part of such an incredible program. Counselors get to shadow 8th graders for the majority of the day, interacting with them in classes and at lunch as well as after school and both groups have loved every minute.

As an advisor, I have the opportunity to see firsthand the development of our counselors as leaders on this trip and I have no doubt that they will continue to go on to do great things after this program and past graduation. Our students greet each challenge with flexibility, openness, and selflessly work with their Directors to find creative alternatives. Each counselor is unique and have different attributes and talents that make working with them an incredible experience and I know that they are making an invaluable difference in the lives of these 8th graders. Although I may not be an Aggie, but in my opinion as an honorary Aggie, these counselors are a true reflection of what Aggies should stand for, how they should act, and  I know that these students parents and fellow Aggies would be so proud of these students if they were here. Until next time, Thanks and Gig em'!

Reflections of a Post Graduate School Graduate...

CHANGING THE WORLD AND OURSELVES

INTRODUCTION

            

        Mahatma Gandhi once said that in order to change the world we must “be the change we want to see in the world.”  This quote is true and relevant to many of the issues we see today. In opening the newspaper and flipping through channels on TV, headlines about the continued downturn of the economy, fighting oversees, struggles in the streets of our neighborhoods and abroad, and other tragedies spill across the pages and screen. News of positive change, reform, and people standing up for what is right is few and far between. In order for the world to change for the better we must first change ourselves and the way we interact with others. By changing our behaviors and ourselves we can then take the first step in changing the world.  This task of change is not easy and not everyone is welcome or willing to make these changes in themselves. However, there are individuals such as Connie Rice who have inspired change in others and dramatically impacted their communities by bringing people together and finding new ways to communicate. In this paper I will focus on three communication choices outlined in the article; action in reform, maintaining status quo, and silence, describe the ethical implications and impact of these choices, and discuss how these choices can be applied to the current immigration debate.  In order to understand the impact of these choices we must first define them and their relevance to the topic of change and communication.

            In Rice’s article three main communication choices emerge; action in reform, maintaining the status quo, and silence, the first choice we will discuss is action in reform. Action in reform is in essence actively working to change or make a difference in a situation, organization, or cause. In the beginning of the article, we learn that Rice has been actively working to reform the civil rights world through litigation and her involvement through grass-roots organizations. In working with the legal system she has been able to make an impact on a smaller scale and believes that the only way to truly solve problems is through political will and action. Rice felt that she could make a bigger dent in the system by working directly with those groups involved and reforming the system little by little at the same time. Rice made the choice to go against the status quo and bring together groups that had not worked together in the past and make the change from “fighting to communicating” (Lefer 2008, 6). Throughout the interview Rice describes the difficulties and obstacles she faced in bringing a positive change to the community, LAPD, and the gang world. Rice went from suing the department for police brutality and being thrown out of the precinct to eventually helping to reform the way the police, gang-intervention workers, and gang members communicate with each other. For example, in the article she states that the majority of the problems and miscommunication between gangs and the police was based in ignorance of identity. By bringing those involved together and dialoguing about the issues, concerns, and possible solutions she was then able to help the LAPD reform their entire training system. By retraining these officers to communicate rather than use brute force when dealing with gangs and conflict could inspire more positive change and prevent future issues. One of the difficulties in communicating and accomplishing this task is seen in the second communication choice, maintaining the status quo.

            Rice has been able to inspire reform in the LAPD, however a large part of that is due to the willingness of those involved to be a part of the change. The idea of change and plans are simply not enough, one must have support from others to cause change.  In Rice’s case she was fortunate in that she had the backing of the police chief, especially in that in many cases in working against status quo this may not be the situation. In going against what is expected or the status quo can lead to push back from administration or those who wish to standby what has been done in the past, even if these changes are positive or have the potential to make organizational life easier or more efficient. Additionally, many individuals feel that by condoning change their success or position will suffer (Samuelson, 10). For example, Rice mentions in the interview that many of the officers did not want to be involved as they did not feel that, even if they were successful, their work would be rewarded when it came time for being promoted (Lefer 2008, 8).  Therefore, putting their needs and concerns over what was best for the organization. Additional push back may come from factors such as; the fear of the unknown, laziness in conforming to new ideas, or unwillingness to accept new perspectives or ways of thinking. In the end, change may lose its battle as its success relies entirely on those who support it, how much they fight for it, and who is willing to listen to their side. This aspect of listening and reflecting is powerful especially in regards the third communication style of silence.

            As they say at the movies, in the previews before the main attraction, silence is golden. In communicating with others often times more can be said by saying nothing at all. Silence can provide many functions and serve as helpful tool or weapon in times of conflict or discord. For example, being silent during a conversation can convey: 1) disagreement, 2) respect, 3) contemplation, 4) empathy, or 5) the creation of listening space (Stewart, 205). In the article Rice is able to use silence as a tool in bringing together the Bloods and Crips simply by listening and reflecting on their issues, values, and concerns. In doing so she was able to take a closer look at gang life and those involved by doing so she was able to understand the members and what values made up their identity. She found out how and why these youths joined the gangs and the situations that forced them to become involved, embracing as Lederach states, “the complexity of identity, “ realizing that the stories of the gang members were not just black and white (Stewart, 538). In speaking with them and better understanding where their identities were rooted she could help them better than before. Additionally, by building trust and credibility, Rice was able to become a resource in their world. At first they slammed the door in her face when two rival gangs were trying to come to a truce but welcomed her as “their research assistant, “ when they found that she had valuable information and resources to aid in communicating with each other (Lefer 2008, 7).  Rice took this information to the police to help as Rice states “rewrite the script” and change the perception of these groups so that the police and gang-intervention workers are more willing to work with them rather than against them. Rice continued to use silence as a similar tool in working with the LAPD. Just as she listened to the gang members and their stories, she met with the police officers to hear their perspectives and concerns. Rice also saw the importance in, as Lederach states, “trying to never ignore or talk away someone’s perception. Instead try to understand where it’s rooted” (Stewart, 538). Through these conversations Rice was able to better understand those involved, their concerns, and by embracing “the complexity” of the situation different perspectives that were ignored in the past were able to come to light, making it easier to find solutions. In working with all three-communication choices Rice was able to successfully build bridges between groups that has not worked together previously and bring about solutions that have had a lasting affect on the community. However, these choices did not come without challenges to Rice’s ethical values and integrity.

            As Lederach states, “conflict is normal in human relationships, and conflict is a motor of change” (Stewart, 533). By maintaining trust, honesty, compassion, and empathy throughout her interactions with these groups Rice was able to transform conflict into resolution and positive change. In incorporating both action in reform and silence into her strategy Rice also relied heavily on creating and maintaining credibility. By getting to know those in power, sitting down with them and talking about their leadership and opportunities to make a positive change in the community, a new sense of responsibility was created. Gang members no longer saw themselves as Crips and Bloods, they held themselves to a new ethical standard as community leaders. Police officers saw guns and brute force as the only solution to the violence. In Rice’s own words, she was “trying to clear a place where new ideas can be vetted and tested.  We have to create some safe zones for innovative people in both camps” (Lefer 2008, 10). In combating status quo Rice used her success with those in management and around her to prove to those on the fence that she was a credible source and was working in their best interest allowing the process to move more smoothly. Had Rice not built her credibility or had the buy in of those involved this obstacle would have been more difficult to get around. At anytime Rice could have given up or chose to work with one side more than the other however because of her strong communication skills Rice was able to cause a lasting positive change.  Rice proves that change is possible and political leaders can learn a lot from her and her experiences especially in regards to dealing with national issues such as immigration.

            Immigration has been a long debated topic in the U.S. and continues to be one of the hot buttons within legislation. Because immigration is not one sided and effects so many people there is not a common voice or perspective on the issue. Additionally, because of stereotypes, ignorance, and false perceptions no one wants to hear the voice of the immigrants or those who support their struggle in the debate. Decision makers and political leaders should learn from Rice’s approach. By incorporating more honest and open dialogue with those involved, actively listening to their concerns and values, and working together to find potential solutions some of the negativity surrounding the debate could be eliminated. This will not completely eliminate the issues within the debate however it is a step in the right direction and would be able to allow for some clarity and change of perspective. Rice challenges us to be open to communicating with others and take the time to really listen to them. If this can be accomplished we can together be the change we want to see in the world.

References

Griffin, E. (2006) A first look at communication theory New York NY; McGraw-Hill

Kouzes, J. M. & Posner, B. Z. (2003). Credibility: How leaders gain and lose it, Why people demand it. Jossey-Bass: San Francisco.

Lefer, D. (2008) Both sides Connie Rice lays down the law to cops and gangs; The Sun April 2008 (issue 388), pp.4-11

Samuelson, W. & R. J. Zeckhauser. (1988). Status quo bias in decision making. Journal of Risk and Uncertainty, 1, pp. 7-59.

Stewart, J. (2006) Bridges not walls [9^th Ed] New York, NY; McGraw-Hill

Hermanas Por Vida Hoy y Por Siempre: My letter of appreciation and love to Sigma Lambda Gamma National Sorority, Inc

Dearest Sigma Lambda Gamma,

As you know, on May 3, 2002 10:36:10 pm, I along with my amazing and incredible line sisters, A'sha and Cherie, joined a sisterhood that would forever change my life. Throughout my college career (and give or take a few years after) I endured difficulties with my grades, gained and lost friends, faced confusion in regards to my future and career, battled and survived depression and an abusive relationship, and took significant steps in journeying toward the road that would lead me to becoming the woman I am today. Without the love, support, and guidance of my hermanas I would not have been nearly as successful. This is why I dedicate these thoughts and memories to you. 

   

Since graduating from college, I have lived in Dallas, Tampa, and now College Station, and no matter where I have gone I have taken SLG with me. When living in Tampa, I met some incredible sisters whom made my life and transition as a Floridian so seamless. We had some incredible times and definitely heated up the dance floor on occasion. I'm so thankful for their love, support, and welcoming me into their lives. I miss them and think of them often. 

 

Now that I've returned to the lonestar state my love for my sisters has only grown stronger. Through our incredible listserv, I was introduced to the Legendary Lambda Alpha Chapter and am now proudly serving as their Alumni Advisor. Through them I have been introduced some pretty cool fellow alumni in Houston whom I'm proud to call my hermanas.  

And although my journey still has many stops along the way to come, I know that my hermanas and the invaluable lessons that I have learned from them with forever remain in my heart. Thank you Sigma Lambda Gamma for changing my life and allowing me to be a Gamma.

Hermanas Por Vida,

Melanie "Querida" Weiser

Ship La Voz

Spring 02

The Divine Delta Alpha Chapter

University of Kansas

                                                

  

Things that make me giggle...

Lately our world has been cluttered with depressing storylines, quickly increasing gas prices, apocalyptic weather changes, and intolerance. I'm not discounting the importance and direness of these issues but instead I am, thanks to my generally cheery outlook, in dire need of a laugh once in a while to help restore my faith in the world. Below are some examples of things that make me giggle...

I hope these musings bring a smile to your face, happiness to your heart, and put a spring in your step. Just remember that whatever is going on will get better through patience, positive thinking, and time. Peace, love, and Equality for all. 

Off we go to the Acuario

Last weekend Brad and I ventured to Dallas (with his parents in tow) to celebrate our engagement and spend some quality time with the familia. As a part of the weekend, we decided to take a trip to Dallas' little known gem, the Dallas Aquarium. Neither Brad nor his parents nor my mom had ever been and I was dying to go back since they finished their reconstruction. Needless to say, it completely exceeded our expectations. Here are a few pictures of our ramblings through Dallas' own "rainforest"...

Hard to believe this is indoors...

Super cute Marmoset!

All I kept thinking was "Never smile at a crocodile, Never tip your hat

and start to talk awhile..."

Tortugas

Crouching Howler (no hidden dragon though, at least to our knowledge)

Brad and I al fresco pero adentro

Ginormous crab!!

It's almost like he's saying "Mr. Demille I'm ready for my close up"

Thank G-d there's glass between us

My favorite part Brad wouldn't let me take him home though!

I told him that he could live in our swimming pool :) Still no dice

All in all it was great day. We got to see some beautiful creatures and walk a lot. Later on that night the familia met up for dinner to celebrate our engagement and make plans for the future. And today as I write this post I'm so fortunate to be celebrating our one month anniversary of being engaged. Until next time, Peace, love, and positivity!

Prince Charming finally stopped and asked for directions...

On this road we call life each day brings us different destinations, stops, and people we meet along the way. I've been lucky enough to have a journey filled with great adventures, friends, experiences, and now love.

This time last year if you would have told me that I'd be in a relationship with such an amazing guy I wouldn't have believed you. However, whether it was by chance, luck, or g-d's plan we met and are planning a life together. 

On Sunday, April 27th, the love of my life surprised me by asking me to marry him. The proposal was simple, genuine, and from the heart. It was everything I had wished for and more. I thank g-d for bringing him into my life and can't wait to start our life together. And just like all my fellow Princesses, my prince has finally come...Someday my Prince will come

Tips to Living a Charmed Life...

'Stumbled Upon' This post at 'Live The Charmed Life'

And I  loved it so much,  I just had to share it... 

You see, when we’re born we see the world in an uncomplicated way. We know what we need, and we ask for it. We like nice people, and we don’t like mean people. We sleep when we’re tired, we eat when we’re hungry, and we stop eating when we’re full.

As we grow older, we eat and drink to console ourselves, rather than addressing what’s bothering us. We overwork to avoid close relationships, rather than finding people we can trust to form strong bonds with. We hold grudges, play games, spend more than we make, want things we don’t need, and we get too far away from our basic human needs. In other words, we complicate things.

Here are 100 ways to uncomplicate it... 

1. Don’t try to read other people’s minds

2. Get up 30 minutes earlier so that you don’t rush/get a ticket while driving too fast/have to explain why you’re late/get fired

3. Get 8 hours of sleep per night so that you think more clearly

4. Stick to your budget

5. Start saving and investing every week, no matter how little you can spare

6. Balance your checkbook

7. Don’t try to be friends with everyone. Cultivate closer relationships with fewer people.

8. Don’t try to do business with everyone. Identify your target client and take very good care of them.

9. Before getting angry, ask yourself if it will really matter in 20 years

10. Focus on being a good person, not on pleasing others

11. Stay home this Saturday, and finish off that nagging chore that you need to finish

12. Kiss and make up

13. Make a weekly menu, and shop for only those items at the market

14. Ask your grandparents the best way to uncomplicate life, and try it for a month

15. Fill up your gas tank when it’s half full

16. Don’t drink alcohol when you’re tired, sad or mad

17. Pay your bills on time

18. Get an annual physical examination

19. Say “I love you” to your significant other and to your children. Studies show that more marriages last, and fewer kids use drugs, when these words are spoken every day.

20. For just one day, imagine everyone’s intentions are good because most people’s are

21. Give away clothes that haven’t been worn in two years

22. Throw out clothes that are in disrepair, and can’t be mended

23. When you have a conflict with someone, talk it out. Don’t let it turn into more than it is.

24. Know what your priorities are in life, and act as if they are your priorities

25. Tell the truth

26. Don’t cheat

27. Don’t steal

28. If you’re holding on to a ridiculous grudge, let it go

29. Clean your house weekly, so that it doesn’t become too large a chore

30. Do your best at work, or at school

31. Don’t eat when you aren’t hungry

32. Eat when you are hungry

33. Be yourself

34. Say no unapologetically

35. Cook simple meals

36. Don’t try to keep up with the Joneses

37. Pay off your car before buying a new one

38. Organise your desk at the office

39. Change your smoke alarm batteries when the clocks spring forward, and again when they fall back

40. Organise your important paperwork

41. Take only half the clothes that you planned to take with you on holiday

42. Help your children with their homework every night, and have an open dialogue with their teachers

43. Have white sheets and white towels in children’s rooms/bathrooms, because they’re easily bleached

44. Spend your time with nice people

45. Avoid drama

46. Don’t text or talk on the phone while driving

47. Turn off the television/video games/computer; they’re time consumers

48. Don’t engage in office politics

49. Refuse to gossip, or talk behind other people’s backs

50. Do the dishes right after dinner

51. Never go to sleep angry

52. Ask nicely for what you need and want

53. Walk 10,000 steps per day to help your heart

54. Do 20 push-ups before speaking in anger

55. Leave work at work

56. Don’t befriend anyone that isn’t trustworthy

57. Don’t envy others

58. Have your oil changed

59. Take vitamin C BEFORE you catch a cold

60. Don’t work more than 8 hours per day

61. Weed your garden weekly

62. Wash your car weekly

63. Have a spring cleaning month every year, and do one room at a time

64. You don’t need to be best friends with work colleagues, but build respectful partnerships

65. Don’t drink and drive

66. Don’t look for reasons to be angry or sad, look for reasons to be happy. You’ll always be able to find plenty of each.

67. Be friendly with your neighbours

68. Return emails and phone messages promptly

69. Schedule in free time

70. Don’t procrastinate

71. Do what you say you’ll do, when you say you’ll do it

72. Be more flexible when you’re able to be

73. Forgive and forget. End of story.

74. Break the consumerism habit…put a three month moratorium in place on buying anything not deemed a necessity

75. Start your diet on September 1, rather than January 1, so that you won’t also have holiday pounds to lose

76. Take care of any health issues or concerns

77. Have your tires rotated

78. Have your brakes checked

79. Have your eyes checked

80. Don’t let your imagination run away with you

81. Let go of perfection in others

82. Let go of perfection in yourself  

83. Don’t try to help those that refuse to help themselves

84. Find a way to reduce your commute to work

85. Have an alloted amount of worry time per day/week, that you strictly abide by

86. Drink more water

87. Eat more salmon

88. Don’t make a mountain out of a molehill

89. Wear your hair in a classic, easy to care for style

90. Finish what you start

91. Wear classic clothes and shoes that never go out of style

92. Create a daily routine

93. Have a 1, 5, 10 and 20 year plan for your financial and life goals

94. Slow down

95. Eat out less often

96. When you ask your husband which outfit looks best, thank him for his answer and wear the one he liked rather than focusing on why he didn’t like the other one

97. Allow your children to grow up

98. Clean out your garage, and donate anything that hasn’t been used in the past year

99. Stretch every day

100. If a relationship is over, let it go